Looking for housemates! Women and children, building and living and growing together…
So this has been topical for me for several years now: I don’t want to live alone (with my partner and kids). It just doesn’t work for me. I want to live with other women – who preferably have kids as well – for quite a few reasons:
- for mutual support and growth stimulation,
- because it’s more economical,
- because living in community is more fun and more relaxed and life-enhancing,
- to promote natural solidarity among women,
- because it’s much easier and partly only possible with several adults to not teach but show kids ways of life, conflict-solving and other social skills, values and beliefs.
My ideal case
would be two more women with a total of two to three more children – space is a little limited, I’m afraid. We’ll agree on what it means to raise kids and what we want to achieve, find a common ground of values and beliefs to live by, share work in ways that bring happiness to all of us, and develop a sense of good food for us. We’ll build a lovely house, rock the garden, celebrate holidays together, learn from and grow with one another, cook and bake often and wonderful things, maybe even sing together, reshape our everyday life to fit our needs, and enjoy life to the fullest!
What I’m bringing to the table
- three kids and a partner,
- a plot and a fairly good basic idea of what to build,
- quite a lot of my (fantastic) family within the immediate surroundings,
- a respectable bit of knowledge and experience with cob building as well as the teaching skills to pass it on,
- also a respectable bit of knowledge and experience with intentional communities of different kinds,
- loads of enthusiasm and conviction (should probably be enough for several people),
- a willingness to grow and change and rise to challenges.
Topics worthy of consideration
- Most of the time I am very extroverted, I can go on about a large variety of subjects for hours (and make it entertaining), and I think and believe a lot. It’s helpful for me to be around people who can counter that, for example by saying ‘Please shut up and let me do some talking!’. In other words, my listening skills could use some improving (I’m working on it).
- I’m also not very good at organising things.
- And finally, most of my life I have avoided conflict or, if that wasn’t possible, given in. That is a lot better now, but I still feel I need a lot of practice, and it’s something I’m a little apprehensive about.
- Since I started this whole project and have already put a lot of time and energy into it, I naturally have given it a lot of shape already. I’m leaving room for other people as much as I can, but a couple of things are quite fixed and decided: The plot and thereby a lot of the whole setting, for example my extended family’s proximity and the number of people that can fit into this.
- I cannot come to any arrangement with smokers. Sorry. (Vaping is ok!)
- I also do not want a TV set in any of the common rooms. It might be ok in a private room, but right now I feel it would be weird.
If this sounds at least a little interesting to your ears, or if you have questions or would like to know more, just send me an email and we’ll see what happens! :-) Also check out this blog article for some of my relevant thoughts on private vs. common space, if you like.